Chicago Makes Everything Better
by Foxy527
Summary: What would happen if Catherine came back...unexpected and unannounced. Would Steve forgive her? Would they be able to move forward?
1. Chapter 1

**One of my favorite moments between Steve and Catherine was when he gave her the Chicago album he'd bought as a gift when she left the Navy. He remembered her telling him once that her mother always played "Chicago" when she was scared. As she opened the gift and saw the album, Catherine's eyes had filled with tears as she said, "Chicago always made everything better." Then, Steve affirms that she has nothing to be afraid of in taking on a new life adventure. **_**He**_** will be there for her and she won't be alone. It was a very poignant moment and one where we saw the vulnerability Steve normally hides so well…..except from Catherine. With that in mind, this is a little scene I dreamed up recently and had to write. **

**I also seriously miss McRoll which is why I am having to get my "fix" by reading or writing about them. I want them to bring Catherine back. This is one version of how I think that could happen. **

**Hope you enjoy. (I own nothing related to Hawaii Five-0 or Chicago although song lyrics have been included.)**

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Steve was relieved to have this hellish week over. After an unusually difficult case, he felt weary to his bones. What he wanted more than anything was to go home and sleep, but he was finding it harder lately to do so. He couldn't get her off of his mind. Images of her were even filling his dreams. So, rather than going home for what he knew would be another restless night, he had gone along with everyone to one of their favorite hangouts to unwind. Being with his ohana made the emptiness he felt a little more bearable, if only for a little while.

He looked around the table and breathed a sigh of relief that everyone was safe. Chin, Kono, Danny, and Lou were there along with Max, Kamekona and even Flipper. It seemed as if everyone was having a good time as they laughed and shared funny stories. The stress of the week was fading and everyone was starting to relax. The tension in his shoulders began to ease as he took another drink of his beer.

Then something in the background caught his attention. He normally didn't pay much attention to the music being played, but this one was hauntingly familiar. The song seemed an odd choice mixed in with the beach music and rock and roll that normally played in the background of this bar. Steve couldn't help but listen to the lyrics even though they made the ache in his heart grow worse.

_Everybody needs a little time away  
I heard her say, from each other  
Even lovers need a holiday  
Far away from each other._

His eyes began to involuntarily scan the crowd as if hoping for a glimpse of her. He knew it was crazy. She had been gone for _months_. They shared a few phone calls and a few text messages before communication faded away several weeks ago. She told him "not to wait for her"…..She had "found her place"…..She wasn't coming home anytime soon. Of all the hurts in his past, this one was quite possibly the hardest. He had finally admitted to himself that he was in love with her, only to lose her. And for what? He knew what she was doing was noble. It was just like her to give of herself to help others. But this was one time in his life he had wanted to be selfish, dammit! Losing her was not an option he had considered. Until it was too late.

_Hold me now.  
It's hard for me to say I'm sorry.  
I just want you to stay.  
After all that we've been through,  
I will make it up to you.  
I promise to.  
And after all that's been said and done  
You're just a part of me I can't let go. _

Something caught his eye and for a moment he lost his breath. Could it be?

"Catherine?" her name was on his lips before he could catch himself.

"What's that, buddy?" Danny turned to look at him and saw him staring in the direction of the bar. Danny followed his gaze until his eyes also fell on her.

Catherine.

She was_ here _and she was making her way to their table. As if he was afraid she would fade away before reaching them, like a mirage that disappears in the desert before a thirsty man, Steve quickly shot up from his seat to go to her.

The song continued in the background.

_Couldn't stand to be kept away just for a day  
From your body.  
Wouldn't wanna be swept away, far away  
From the one that I love.  
_  
He met her halfway and pulled her into his arms as if he would never let her go.

"Catherine." Steve's voice was so full of turmoil that Catherine instantly felt the guilt already weighing her down grow even heavier.

Not caring that his entire team and probably most of the bar would be watching them, Steve held her face in his hands as he leaned down to taste her. God, it had been so long and he had missed the feel of her, the taste of her, the smell of her. His lips fell on hers and he kissed her as if his life…..or the very breath he was breathing…..depended upon him doing so. Catherine put her arms around his neck to pull him closer and fought the urge to wrap her legs around him and love on him until the pain she saw in his eyes went away. After a few moments, Steve pulled away long enough to look at her again trying to convince himself she was really there. Keeping his hands on her face, he saw regret in her tear rimmed eyes.

"What are you doing here?" his voice was husky as he made a valiant effort to keep his emotions under control.

A tear made its way down Catherine's cheek. "I missed you." She said softly.

Steve swallowed the lump in his throat. "I missed you, too. I missed you so damn much, Cath."

By now, the entire table was watching them but no one dared interrupt. Everyone was in shock to see Catherine there after so many months away.

Steve motioned his eyes in the direction of the bar. "You asked them to play this song?"

She nodded as another tear escaped to fall down her face. "Chicago always made everything better."

Steve wiped the tear from her cheek before pulling her closer so that his arms were completely enveloping her, "Aw, Catherine."

Catherine clung to him. "I'm so sorry, Steve. I never should have stayed away."

Steve loosened his grip on her and brushed a strand of hair from her face before offering her a small smile. As she looked up into his eyes, she saw a tenderness that took her breath away. Steve rarely let his guard down. It went against everything he believed in to let go of his control. But for Catherine…for Catherine, he always opened himself up. Even now after her decision to stay away had left his heart raw, he found he couldn't deny that part of himself to her. He was defenseless against the pain and regret he saw in her eyes.

"Can we go somewhere and talk?" she asked.

Talking wasn't really what Steve wanted to do right now. He wanted to be his alpha male self, pick up his woman, carry her home, and then work on getting "reacquainted" again. But he knew they had things to work out, so he agreed.

He never let go of her hand as he led her over to the table to see their extended family. Hugs were shared all around as they all told her how much they'd missed her. Everyone was just happy to have her back.

Eventually, Catherine looked back to Steve. He reached his hand out to her and led her down to the beach where they could talk. No matter what happened, he wasn't letting her go this time. If her absence had taught him anything it was that he wouldn't live without her again. No matter what.

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So what do you think? Should I continue this so we can see how Steve and Catherine resolve things between them? Please give me your thoughts.


	2. Chapter 2

Steve and Catherine walked silently hand in hand until they reached the beach just beyond the outdoor dining area where the rest of their "family" sat trying not to cast curious glances their way.

Once they were far enough away to be out of earshot of everyone but still within sight, they stopped. Catherine's hair blew softly in the breeze coming off the waves and Steve's heart swelled as he stared at her beautiful profile. God, but he had missed her.

"So what brought you back?" Steve's voice was quiet but firm and insistent as he watched her. "I mean, after all this time…You said you weren't coming back, so what changed your mind?"

Catherine's turned sad eyes in his direction. "There was a woman in the village whose name was Jamila. She…. lost her husband….a few weeks ago." Catherine crossed her arms over her chest in a protective stance. "They were so in love. Truly and genuinely in love and just recently found out they were pregnant with their first baby."

"What happened?" Steve asked quietly.

Catherine lip quivered as she turned back to look at the ocean and watch the tide rolling softly in…..and out…..in…..and out.

Steve stepped towards her and turned her towards him. Catherine tried like hell to avoid his gaze until he put a finger under her chin forcing her to look at him. "Tell me what happened, babe."

She swallowed the lump in her throat. Hearing the endearment from Steve's mouth made her heart clench in her chest, so she willed herself to tell him the story of Jamila and Rami who had inspired her, broken her heart, and then convinced her to follow her heart.

"His name was Rami. They'd known each other for a very long time but just got married about a year ago." Catherine close her eyes as the memory of what had happened haunted her. "Taliban soldiers raided the village a few weeks ago and took most of the men with them. They killed the livestock that was used for food, destroyed the village, and basically left the women and children without anything to survive. The only reason I escaped being captured was because they had a place for me to hide in the floor of a shelter they used for some of the animals. Sort of like a barn. Had the soldiers known there was an American in the village, they would have killed everyone looking for me. I heard the chaos going on outside, but was powerless to stop it by myself. It was the most helpless feeling I've had in my life. I stayed hidden until Jamila came to find me and told me what had happened."

Steve let out a low curse and waited silently for her to continue.

"Then, we got word a couple of weeks later that Rami had been killed along with a few others. I didn't just _see_ Jamila's pain…..I _felt_ it."

She paused and took a deep breath as she fought to keep her spiraling emotions under control. It was a losing battle. Catherine's heart felt raw with the memories of what had happened.

"Jamila knew that my heart belonged to someone. I guess I've talked about you a lot over the last few months." She stopped to offer him a sad smile and was moved by the feelings she saw in his gaze. "When we found out that Rami had been killed, she pleaded with me to return to my 'American soldier', as she called you. 'You will never be whole until you are with the one who holds your heart', she said. And she was right. I don't feel whole when I'm away from you, Steve. Even though I told you I had 'found my place' there, my heart…..My heart was always with _you._ "

Steve knew the feeling. Theirs had never been a "normal" or conventional relationship. Separations had been a normal part of their routine since they were both enlisted with the Navy. But this time had been different. Steve had never felt as incomplete as he had this time while Catherine was gone. Maybe it was because she said she wasn't coming back and he was forced to feel emotions he'd kept buried before. Catherine was his.

"I know that feeling. I've felt it the whole time you've been gone. Cath, you know me better than anyone and you know how hard it is for me to express how I feel, but you need to know that I have regretted…..at least a thousand times since you've been gone…..that I didn't tell you I love you sooner…Or more often."

"I knew you loved me, Steve."

Steve shook his head. "Doesn't matter. I didn't _tell_ you that I love you, and I have regretted that. Having you gone and facing the reality that you probably weren't coming back…..Honest to God, I didn't know what to do with that."

Catherine heart felt as if it would beat out of her chest as they stared at each other in silence. Then, a frown found its way to Steve's handsome face. Catherine may have told him what happened, but he knew she still wasn't being completely open with him.

"Tell me the _real_ reason you stayed away." He quietly demanded.

"What do you mean?"

"Look, I know you wanted to stay and help the people in the village, but you aren't telling me everything. Why did you stay away?" Catherine moved to turn away from him again, but he wouldn't allow it. "Dammit, Catherine. _Look _at me." When she looked up to him again, he voice softened, "You were running away….from _us_? I want to know why."

Catherine took a deep breath and blew it out in frustration. She felt as if Steve was looking into the very depths of her soul. And if she was honest with herself, she would admit that is exactly what he was doing. Damn him and his sixth sense! Tears filled her eyes again and she stalled to wipe the rebellious tears away in frustration.

Steve, however, wouldn't be deterred. He was going to get this out of her if it killed him. "Talk to me, Cath."

"Okay." She resigned herself to the fact he wasn't going to give up. Steve was tenacious when he wanted something. "After I left the Navy…..and then Billy died….I felt lost. Like I didn't have a _purpose_ anymore. The Navy had taken over half of my life and it was gone. Then the job I'd taken with Billy was gone when he got killed. I just didn't know what to do with myself. I felt completely lost. I was also hit with the reality of losing _you._"

She glanced back towards the team sitting and laughing with each other. "You put your life in danger nearly every day, Steve. I don't think I could survive losing you too." Her eyes pleaded with him to understand. "So you're right," she continued, "I ran away…..because I couldn't bear the thought of loving you and then losing you some day."

Steve pulled her back into his arms and held her so close she could hear the beat of his heart. "But then Jamila forced me think about things," Catherine continued, "Even in her grief after losing Rami, she said she never regretted a moment they had together. Seeing her love for him….even after he was gone…..made me realize that I was wasting precious time with _you._ In that moment I knew that I would never forgive myself if I stayed away."

She lifted her head to look up at Steve with tear stained cheeks and her soul completely vulnerable to him. He thought she'd never looked more beautiful. He leaned down to kiss away the tears on her cheeks before taking her mouth in his again. "You aren't going to lose me, Catherine. Not ever. Not having you here with me has been one of the hardest things I've gone through aside from losing my dad, and it took everything in me not to come over there and drag your stubborn ass back home. To me…..where you belong."

Catherine let out a small laugh as she looked up into the eyes of the man she loved. "You're such a caveman."

Steve grinned back before growing serious again, "I knew you had to work all of this out for yourself, though. Now that you're back, I'll be damned if I let you go again. Understand?"

Too moved to speak, Catherine simply nodded her head.

Steve gripped her arms and looked into her eyes, "If we're going to make this work, we have to promise to talk to each other from here on out." Steve's mouth quirked up into a hesitant smile as he looked down at her, "I'm going to be the first to admit, it won't be easy for me, but I'm going to try. I can't deny anymore how much I need you."

They spent a few precious moments in silence enjoying the fact they were together again. Having the weight lifted off of her, Catherine sighed in contentment at being in Steve's arms again. She may have told him that she'd "found her place" when she decide to stay away, but how wrong she had been. _Steve_ was her home.

He leaned down to kiss her again and Catherine felt the hunger in his touch. Suddenly, she couldn't think of anything else but being alone with him. As if reading her mind, Steve broke contact and looked down at her his eyes dark with desire, "What do you say we go tell everyone 'goodbye' and then go home."

Home. It had never sounded better now that she knew "home" was where ever Steve was at.

Steve gave her a naughty grin, "We have about six months of fantasies to make up for, Lieutenant."

Catherine found herself blushing at the promise in his words. Steve put an arm under her legs and quickly swept her into his arms. It was reminiscent of the time he had shown up in a tux to take her to dinner and carried her away in front of everyone. He really could be romantic when he wanted to be.

"Take me home, Sailor…..and tell me about those fantasies on the way there."

Steve shook his head in disagreement. "No way. I'd rather just _show_ you."


End file.
